Duct tape the windows! Shave the kids' heads! Run in screaming terror when you hear the first robin of Spring! It's COMING! It's going to be here before we know it, and we're all going to die horrible, painful deaths.

Okay, not really. But, I am amazed at the mass hysteria surrounding an illness that, thus far, has been spread to stupid humans who do things like give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to dead pigeons. Pigeons are rats with wings, Why would you want to put your mouth to their beaks? Ick! Right now, it's still unlikely that you can get the disease from another human. So, why the mad rush to insanity?

I'll tell you why - it's been a slow news year. The media is so hell-bent on increasing the ratings of their "news shows" that they will hype anything that they know will freak people out. Since human cases of the Avian Influenza A (H5N1) virus began appearing in 1997, just over 100 people worldwide have been infected, and about half those have died. According to the World Health Organization's website, almost all of those infected lived in rural or periurban areas where birds roam (and crap!) freely, and almost all cases have been reported in people who had direct contact with infected birds or their secretions. But, because the American public is gullible and, unfortunately, highly uninformed, the media is able to capitalize on our fears of dying and increase their ratings each time they increase the fear level. They are playing on the fragile emotions of people who they know will want to see more and more and more until they all start barricading themselves in their houses for fear that the slightest human contact outside of television will kill them.

Now, I'm not saying that some reasonable precautions are out of line. I might even go so far as to stock up on some good-quality medical masks, but that;s just as much to protect a newborn as it is to protect the family from bird flu. But I think living your life in fear of something that isn't a justifiable risk is nuts. Pessimism is not what made this country great (can you imagine George Washington looking around and saying: "You know, I don't think we can beat the Redcoats. Let's just give up now"), and it's certainly not what makes people happy. Be optimistic. It's a much more interesting way to live.